Now here is a question, is it ok for me to pick on the disabled? Of course it is! I’d pick on anyone, I don’t exclude myself from ridicule, you’ll have seen that if you’ve read any of my other posts, so why should somebody escape just because they have a disability? Isn’t that a form of positive discrimination? Why yes it is. So let’s rock on…
I went to the cinema at the weekend, the film was popular, so the theatre was full up, we basically got first row seats, just behind the “flid zone” – great I thought, I can stretch my legs here, right where the wheelchairs would go. After all, there is not likely to be any wheelchair types coming in tonight.
WRONG! As soon as I said it, in comes wheelchair dude. He parks himself right in front of me. Suddenly my clear view becomes a clear view with head-shaped chunk cut out of the bottom of the screen. FFS!
I’m sat there thinking to myself, “can I ask him to lower his head?”, I shift uncomfortably in my seat muttering to myself, reassuring myself that I should let him disrupt my view because, surely, he is a really nice guy. Aren’t they all? The Inbetweeners had a go at this one, the wheelchair guy in that show was a complete berk.
Anyway, I contemplate moving, there are a couple of free seats over to my right, but wait, will I get frowned upon for getting pissed off by a disabled guy? I don’t know!?! What is the protocol for these situations.
Can I simply wheel him away like Alan Partridge at the Colmans party?
Anyway, I don’t have any cutting remarks or nasty things to say about this guy, he did fuck all to me and to be fair, he probably didn’t even realise his egg-shaped head was even in my way. But what I want to know is why nobody has invented a wheelchair with a system to lower the seat or even some sort of trap-door that I could activate to get him out of my bloody way.
The Dark Knight rises. I wish I fucking had. Maybe I’d have been able to see above his fucking head!
themiseryguts 